FEBRUARY, 2012 REVIEWS

FEBRUARY, 2012 REVIEWS

(NOTE: The "smell ratings" at the end of some reviews rate the actual SMELL of the book and have nothing to do with the story.  Smell Ratings: 5 = excellent, 1 = odorless, 2-4 = you figure it out.  Book Key: hc = hardcover / tp = trade paperback / mmp - mass market paperback / rarer forms described.  Unless otherwise noted, all reviews are by Nick Cato)

PREVIEW

CARNAGE ROAD by Gregory Lamberson (to be released April 3, 2012 by Print is Dead / 86 pp / tp and eBook)


Every time I say I’m tired of zombie stories, I seem to read one that proves the subgenre is simply here to stay.  CARNAGE ROAD is a fine example of why: part EASY RIDER, part DAWN OF THE DEAD, this quick novella features two biker buddies, Boone and Walker, who decide to take a cross-country trek when the rest of their gang, the Floating Dragons, abandon their Buffalo, NY compound when a gang of rogue cops kill half their members.  Boone always wanted to see Hollywood, and convinces Walker to go with him—Walker had recommended trying Canada, but the cold weather didn’t appeal to Boone.


The story wastes NO time getting to the undead action.  Along the way our anti-heroes encounter both sane and insane religious zealots, manage to take in a movie at an abandoned Indiana theater, are arrested in Kansas by racist political extremists, all the while battling hordes of cannibalistic cadavers and burning rubber on their hogs.  The boys also come across the most imaginative group of zombies I’ve read in some time at the foot of a twelve-story building.  When they finally reach Hollywood there’s a hysterical scene where undead celebrities are spotted.  When they realizing there’s just too many zombies around, they decide to head to Texas, where they join a group of survivors at the Alamo.


CARNAGE ROAD may be brief but it’s packed to the gills with brain-splattering zombie goodness, social commentary, a bleak apocalyptic ending, and good old-fashioned b-movie-style fun.  Zombie fans will love it.

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THE FALL by Guillermo del Toro and Chuck Hogan (2011 Harper Collins / 448 pp / mmp)

This second in the series definitely requires the reading familiarity of the first, but, given how rip-roaring a series it is, that shouldn’t be any sort of a hardship. 

THE FALL picks up right after THE STRAIN, in a New York plunged into plague, riots, and chaos. The vampire virus has also begun overwhelming several other cities and the world is well on its way to total pandemic. 

By now, the truth is hard to deny, but vindication isn’t a whole lot of comfort to those who’d been trying to warn the authorities since the beginning. The changed hosts of the deadly blood-worms are driven by their hunger, obedience to their vampiric lord known as the Master, and the intense urge to find and bind their loved ones into the same hideous fate. 

One small group is led by an aged pawnbroker/scholar who’s dedicated his life to tracking the Master, and by a discredited CDC expert who’s lost his wife and must now protect their son from the hungry fate worse than death. Another is made up of former gangers turned resistance fighters (plus one retired luchadore, my personal favorite character in these books, edging out the exterminator), assisted by a lefthanded alliance of other vampires who oppose the Master’s goals. 

On the other side, of course, is the Master himself, and his ever-growing legions. He’s also got the support of a very old, very sick, very rich man whose intention is to barter his financial and political power in exchange for the bite, the transformation, and eternal life. 

The writing is as tight and top-notch as ever. There’s no mid-trilogy slump, but the quivering suspense of being in the middle of a long scary bridge … too far to turn back, so you’ve got to keep going. 

What I do know is I’m very glad I got this one so soon after reading the first, and that I got the third at the same time so it is coming up next in line.

-Christine Morgan

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LOST HOMICIDAL MANIAC (ANSWERS TO "SHIRLEY") by Jeff Strand (2011 / 175 pp / eBook)

The long-awaited 4th novel in Strand's Andrew Mayhem series finds Mayhem and his wife receiving news that they're about to become parents for the third time...only with triplets!  His partner Roger is finally thinking of proposing to his girlfriend on the day the bumbling duo open their own business, 'A/R Tasks & Investigations.'  That's right folks: Andrew and Roger have now gone legit in the attempt to officially try to help people who need their unusual problems solved.

The first day in the new office is slow, so the boys reluctantly take on an unrelated odd job to get the cash flow started. Tired, and just before they close for the day, a woman comes in seeking their help.  She claims that she might be a serial killer, and convinces Andrew and Roger to take her case.  They follow her to an abandoned house where she thinks--in her blacked-out states--she has killed people and buried their body parts.  Not wanting to run away if she snaps, she also convinces Andrew to handcuff himself to her as Roger begins digging under the floor boards.

From this point, it doesn't take long for the mayhem to get going..  LOST HOMICIDAL MANIAC then goes into a relentless, slapstick pace full of goons, killers, over-the-top violence, Strand's trademark sarcasm, and plenty of laughs.  One scene involving an old woman, a car chase, and hundreds of bullets had me in stitches (anyone who has read a Strand novel knows he has a way of making you laugh at the sickest, most insane things imaginable).  There's also a cameo that hardcore Mayhem fans will get a real kick out of.

Fans of the series will love seeing the boys back in action, as well as an old foe return for revenge.  Here's hoping we don't have to wait seven more years until the fifth adventure...

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DEAD IN THE TRUNK by Craig Saunders (2011 Amazon Digital Services / eBook)

DEAD IN THE TRUNK is a collection of sixteen short stories by Craig Saunders.  I discovered the author when I read his story “The Scarecrow” in the double novella The Scarecrow and The Madness (written by Robert Essig).  I was very impressed with “The Scarecrow” so I was pleased when I found out he had a collection out.

The first story, “Mudman,” leads you to believe you know the ending of the story, but instead shocks you.  It’s a great tale of love and betrayal that will creep you out as you read.

“Grass Can Be Weeds, Too” gently leads you through the story, making you uneasy as you read.  A big storm is the perfect backdrop for the horror that is eventually shown to us.  And while the ending is a little telegraphed, you will still enjoy it and maybe even think it’s perfect.

After reading “The Monkey’s Sandwich,” you might not want to eat biscuits again, just like Bill, who tells the story.  It reminded me a bit of the recent “Rise of the Planet of the Apes,” and was just as exciting.  I’ve always had an aversion to monkeys, and thanks to both this story and the movie, I now have a bit of a fear of them as well.

“Fake Plastic” is a fun revenge story, but it’s not an ordinary revenge story.  A doctor pays for his malpractice with something other than money.  A patient’s sister isn’t happy with the care the good doctor provided for the sister, so she does something about it.  A little gruesome, but still fun to read.

Each story in this collection is just as good as the one before it.  Craig Saunders has proven himself a writer to watch.

-Sheri White

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MANGLED MEAT and CARNAL SURGERY by Edward Lee (both titles 2011 Deadite Press / tp)

I’m not sure how many times or how many ways I can say that Ed Lee stories are the squickety-squickest of the Squicky McSquickerson squickfests, but … well, they ARE! 

Just so nasty, so gross, so disturbing, so eew with a capital EEW!!! Nothing is sacred, nothing is safe, there’s no far that’s too far! If you can imagine an atrocity, he’s probably already written it. If you can’t, he’s probably written that, too. In excruciating, vivid, unforgettable detail. 

And oh, I do love it!

The latest two of Lee’s gory goodies from Deadite to land in my lap,MANGLED MEAT and CARNAL SURGERY, do not disappoint in living up to reputation and expectations. 

MANGLED MEAT contains three short works. The first, and least squicktastic, of the bunch is “The Decortication Technician.” It’s a sci-fi piece that admirably showcases the author’s genius and vocabulary, loading up the futuristic jargon in ways that still come across as clear and understandable even to the non-tech-savvy reader such as myself. Decortication, by the way, is the process of cutting the shell, carapace, or exoskeleton off of something. Like an insect. Or a big chitinous alien bug. This particular technician of it is part of the science team on an exploration vessel, and when their explorations turn up a mysterious, sealed spacecraft, the job defaults to him of getting the thing open to see what’s inside. 

The second story’s word-for-the-day features in “The Cyesolagniac,” which is a term having to do with the fetishization of pregnant women. You might think you can guess where this one’s going, and, you’re on the right track … a man with that obsession finds and hires a very pregnant hooker … only to find the tables getting turned on him in some especially nasty ways. Does he deserve it? I’m still not sure.

It’s the last, and innocuously-titled “Room 415” that most reduced my psyche to a gibbering ball curled up in the corner of my skull. If I did kind of want to feel sorry for the guy in the last story, I had no such sympathies for the guys in this one. An electronics rep in town for a convention, struggling with sexual dysfunction after a bitter divorce, happens to witness a scene of violence and brutality from his hotel room window … and discovers that it turns him on. After that, it gets really appalling. 

CARNAL SURGERY consists of eleven tales … it starts off with “The Seeker,” in which ultimate truth turns out to not be a good thing to go looking for after all. “Please Let Me Out” is disturbingly sexy or sexily disturbing, depending on your POV. I enjoyed the ugly pressure-cooker microcosm social dynamics of “The Order of Nature,” and the creepy bigger-picture themes of “Goddess of the New Dark Age.”

“Hands,” the longest piece in the book, is a nifty psych thriller that was my favorite of the bunch, and is followed by the wafer-thin mint of the four-page “The Table” as a very tasty little aperitif. “Death, She Said” revisits the dark, creepy, haunty and ultimate truth issues touched on in a couple of the earlier stories. “Gut-Shot” is a gritty and effecctively done second-person cop drama. 

“The Piece of Paper” and “Make A Wish” are more of Lee’s set-in-Seattle homeless yarns that, given where I work and the population I work with, totally hit the verisimilitude nerve dead on. And “The Blurred Room,” (a version of which appeared as “I.C.U.” in another anthology) is vindictively satisfying. 

All in all, good stuff, lots of good good stuff in a bad bad way … just how I like it!

-Christine Morgan

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A HOLLOW CUBE IS A LONELY SPACE by S.D. Foster (2011 Eraserhead Press / 91 pp / tp)

Yet another offering from Eraserhead's 'New Bizarro Author Series,' this time introducing the world to UK writer S.D. Foster with 23 short-short stories, most having a fairy tale feel. 

Among my favorites are 'Matilda Goes Shopping,' about a robe-wearing woman who takes care of her obese brother. Her life is drastically changed when she's raped by a supermarket (yes...a supermarket); 'Slothra,' the sad tale of a has-been Kaiju star; 'Silk Flower,' a bizarro take on Pinocchio with an oddly touching conclusion, and finally, 'A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Chip,' where we meet a singing primate who learns he can't pay the rent in bananas. 

While a couple of stories are truly head-scratching, most of A HOLLOW CUBE is accessible without sacrificing the bizarro element. 

A decent and imaginative first collection. I'd like to see a novella or novel from Foster.

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DESIREE by Ken Goldman (2010 Damnation Books / 101 pp / tp and eBook)


Beautiful Desiree has an odd problem: whenever she kisses someone, they become infatuated with her and eventually commit suicide.  Her first victim is a young boy named Tommy who killed himself shortly after kissing her during a game of spin the bottle at a party.  Tommy's sister, Tamara, keeps her eye on Desiree over the years, discovering other men have met the same fate as her brother.


Goldman's novella bounces around time-wise and can easily be read in one sitting.  Although the author never clearly explains exactly WHY Desiree's mother's breast milk has given her this strange ability, it gives the story a nice mystery as we're never sure if Desiree is completely aware of what she's doing.  And despite the nifty ending, I found myself confused on a few occassions, but not to the point I was lost.


DESIREE is an interesting erotic thriller with a latent supernatural leaning that's definitely worth a look.


Smell Rating: 1

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DEVIL BAT DIARY by Peter H. Brothers (2011 / 221 pp / tp)

This mock journal tells the "true" story of what happened in a small American town during the summer of 1939.  The 1940 Bela Lugosi film THE DEVIL BAT was a watered-down version of these events, giving this book a "found footage" type of feel.

Chicago newspaper reporter Johnny Layton is sent to the small town of Heathville to get the scoop on the death of Ray Heath, an heir to a multi-million dollar cosmetics company.  Johnny is partnered with ace photographer "One Shot" McGuire, a "big-mouthed weasel" who Johnny can't stand.

It turns out someone is trying to kill off the Heath and Morton families with large killer bats.  The two clans are co-owners of the company, and Johnny Layton eventually discovers the bats attack those who wear a particular new brand of the companies' skin lotion.

Lugosi's character from the film, Mr. Carruthers, is here portrayed in a similar fashion, but some revelations on the "real" nature of other DEVIL BAT characters are quite funny.

DEVIL BAT DIARY is interesting for fans of the classic Lugosi film, but those not familiar with the source material might be put off by some of the goofy-sounding dialogue and an abundance of distracting slang (McGuire, Carruthers, and a local sheriff speak in heavy accents which the author spells out phonetically, which at times makes the prose a chore to sift through).

Flawed, but fun stuff for fans of classic monster movie fiction.

Smell Rating: 1

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PLEASE DON'T GO by Eric Dimbleby (2011 Pill Hill Press / 277 pp / tp)

Zephyr is a young grocery store clerk, dealing with the typical ups and downs of college life.  He's also planning on proposing to his girlfriend Jackie, both of them English majors.  One day he is assigned to deliver groceries to an old man who lives in an isolated house.  Charles Rattup turns out to be a writer who was once published in a classic anthology, quickly earning Zephyr's respect.  Charlie invites him to come back again, and the two develop a friendship built around literature and movies.

But Charlie begins to act strange, talking to an unseen presence, causing Zephyr to doubt the man's sanity.  But by the time he finds out Charlie isn't crazy, it's too late for Zephyr, as he is now held hostage by a sexually-charged entity that may or may not be the legendary Lillth, a demon common to many culture's folklore.

PLEASE DON'T GO is a clever take on ghosts, possession, and succubbi.  Dimbleby gives this one a truly unique flavor, along with a cast you'll care about and plenty of scenes filled with tension and dread.  The spirit controling Zephyr's life is as cunning as it is evil, slick as it is violent.  I was reminded of the film THE ENTITY only with a more brutal demon at play, as the torture she puts Zephyr through will get anyone's skin crawling.

This study of a man's desire to survive in the face of total hopelessness is also a genuine genre spook-fest, delivering the goods and concluding with a bit of a twist (and increasingly dreadful) finale.  Great stuff.

Smell Rating: 2

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HISSERS by Ryan C. Thomas (2011 Permuted Press / 254 pp / tp)

Four troubled teens … two girls and two boys … on the eve of beginning their high-school years … each with their own troubles and fears about the future, bullies and peer pressure, parents and growing up … the trashy chick and the fat video game geek, the all-around good guy and the shy one with the dark secret … it’s the perfect setup for a classic coming-of-age tale …

And BLAM, a plane crashes smack into the middle of town, spraying debris and burning jet fuel everywhere! It’s disaster, it’s carnage, but that is still only the beginning because the mangled ruins of charred and bloodied corpses GET UP and go running around on a contagious chompy RAMPAGE!!! Infection and horrific mutations ensue!

Basically, things start off kind of slow and normal, and then there’s a high-speed plunge into nonstop action and terror, with no reprieve and no turning back. Very much the rollercoaster … chugga-chugga up the slope, reach the crest, and AAAAAHHH screaming dives and hard cranking turns and violent bumps all the way to the end. 

Glorious chaos and gore engulf everything as the four teens scramble to survive, to search for their families, and to try and figure out what in the hell happened. I’ve noticed how a lot of authors seem to have trouble writing kid and teen characters; these all rung to me very genuine (speaking as the parent of a teen). Their dialogue, their side-concerns and distractions, their behaviors … excellently handed, quite well done. 

Un-put-down-able, exciting, gruesome, tragic and thrilling. Thumbs up!  Whole clusters of undead mutant thumbs!

-Christine Morgan

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THE CRUD MASTERS by Justin Grimbol (2011 Eraserhead Press / 81 pp / tp)

Eraserhead Press continues their 'New Author Bizarro Series' with this ode to gang novels and giant monster movies. 

Boogers is a member of the Crud Masters, a group of outcasts who live on Shelter Island. Among their colorful members are Snuggles (a beefy guy who likes to hug people) and Pussy Bear, a rich woman who spent all her money to make herself look like a bear. With boobs. 

Shelter Island also has a heavy army presence: it seems giant sea monsters (called Dagoons) keep coming ashore and causing trouble, the military doing what they can to control them. Rival gang 'NOLA' (comprised of the island's rich kids) becomes unstoppable when one of their members reveals his van can turn into 'Swagatron,' a giant robot. The Crud Masters plan a way to compete, and manage to trap and train one of the Dagoons, leading to a showdown between robot and monster. 

With cyborg threesomes, rampaging monsters, animal attacks, and plenty of laughs, THE CRUD MASTERS is a wickedly fun novella, featuring simplistic prose that reads like a YA author on crack.

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SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE HOMOPHOBES by Robert Devereux (2011 Deadite Press / 316 pp / tp)

If I had to name one downside to SANTA STEPS OUT (the previous book in this series), it’d be that the polyamory message maybe sometimes seemed a little heavy-handed and condescending, a bit pushy and preachy. Not so much a “to each their own, mutual respect and understanding” as a “poly’s THE only right and natural way to be and anyone else is pathetic!” Which seems kind of meta-contrary. 

In this one, there’s no maybe-sometimes about it … the message clubs you over the head right from the title and keeps on clubbing all the way through. This is a “homophobia is BAD!” lecture, and as such, it suffers from a fairly basic problem: the people who most need to get clubbed over the head with that message aren’t the ones who’d be reading the book, while the ones who already KNOW that are liable to find it both frustrating and tedious to be clubbed over the head with it that much. I was reminded of, for example, panels on sexism and harassment at gaming cons, where the creeps who could benefit aren’t going to attend, or even think they need to attend. And whoever does go to such a panel is already going to be aware and conscientious of the issue.

SANTA CONQUERS THE HOMOPHOBES picks up shortly after SANTA STEPS OUT, where domestic harmony at the North Pole is disturbed when Santa’s little stepdaughter and assistant Wendy – whose task is to select a few good children each year and give them encouraging visions of their future – gets upset by what her premonitions show. One of her chosen few is destined to commit suicide after growing up tormented by intolerant parents, preachers, and bullies. Wendy asks Santa to fix it, and Santa, who dotes on her, agrees. 

He soon realizes he’s in way over his head, not to mention that he’s stepped outside the bounds of his office, and has to request help from higher in the heavenly heirarchy (the further exploration of the reinvented myths here made even me a smidge uncomfortable and I don’t consider myself religious … I’m not at all sure how it’d go over with someone who does). 

So, permission is granted to try and change the hearts/minds of four people most pivotal in the child’s life, and Santa’s sleigh ride becomes a Fantasy Island guilt trip in the best Ghost-of-Christmas-Future sense. 

Or maybe I just don’t “get” it and am being cynical because I was hoping for another gore-slathered sexromp …

The gore-slathered sexromps are, sadly, not to be found here. More like gore-slathered gore, especially because once the Tooth Fairy finds out what Santa’s up to, she’s more determined than ever to punish the jolly ol’ elf and his happy family. She’s lost her Easter ally but has a brood of nasty imps to do her bidding. 

Meanwhile, at Santa’s workshop, there’s a parallel example of intolerance and hypocrisy in action, when one of the elves goes on an anti-nosepicking crusade. Anyone who starts their own personal inner countdown clock whenever some politician, celebrity, evangelist or other public figure mounts the outspoken moral high horse  will know how that’s gonna go. “Cue humongous scandal exposee in 3, 2, 1 …”

I also couldn’t help finding this one fairly heavily USA-centric in terms of the calendar … the whole world doesn’t celebrate Christmas, but when one of the landmark dates set for Santa’s goal involves Thanksgiving, well …

All in all, I guess I found this one a considerable letdown after its predecessor. But the characters are fun, the imagination remains nicely twisted, and I’d certainly be eager to read a third volume!

-Christine Morgan

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STEAMY SCREAMS: AN ANTHOLOGY OF EROTIC HORROR edited by Jack Burton (2011 Blood Bound Books / 166 pp / tp)

Woohoo! Smut! Twenty-one quickie short stories of it, a surprise goodie grab bag with enough assortment and variety to have something for almost everyone. Provided you like smut, surprises, and having your goodies grabbed. 

Be it people, places, or things … living or dead … natural and supernatural … solos, pairings, groups, combos … happy endings, tragic endings, gruesome endings … romance and raunch, kindness and kink … temptation, tradition and taboo … there are of course countless ways to get busy, and plenty of them are featured in this book. 

Among those I liked the best were Tonia Brown’s “Dirty Little Fish Story” (the one that got away? you should BE so lucky!), “The Libidonomicon” by Gregory L. Norris (quite lives up to the promise of the title!), M.P. Johnson’s “Killer Nails” (giving whole new meanings to the term ‘hand job’), “The Club” by Brad Hunter (a cautionary tale of the lines between fantasy and reality), Larissa Alloway’s “Phantom Deposit” (short and sweet paranormal romance), and “A Witch to Live” by James Beamon (decidedly wicked!)

If some of the others didn’t do much for me in either the scary or sexy department, well, that’s the great thing about anthologies like this … another story will be along in just a couple pages. 

You’ll also find fairy tales retold, revenge tales that would be right at home in the horror comics, some werewolves and vampires and creatures beyond classification, and more. A little bit of everything adds up to a satisfying bundle. If horrorsmut is your thing, this one’s worth a look.

-Christine Morgan

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D.O.A: EXTREME HORROR ANTHOLOGY edited by David C. Hayes and Jack Burton (2011 Blood Bound Books / 321 pp / tp)

D.O.A: EXTREME HORROR ANTHOLOGY is a collection of twenty-nine short stories and they are extreme and disturbing.

Among my favorites are the very disturbing “The Boogieman’s Key” by Calie Voorhis about a man using a special key to enter the dreams of his foster daughter to sexually abuse her, however Melissa learns from therapy that she is stronger than he is; “Digital Media” by Michael Cieslak about a man who is tortured and murdered because he won a contest on a website frequented by sexual deviants, and this one has a creepy twist; “Sickened” by Tonia Brown about a town’s sin eater who is made extremely sick by the sins he consumed of a pedophile; and “Cold Air” by Edward R. Rosick about a couple going through medical school when one discovers that she can capture the essence of life and the soul through necrophilia.

Other fantastic stories include “Plague Hulk” by Glynn Barrass about a plague ship boarded by thieves in the hopes of robbing the dead but the thieves don’t make it very far; “Go to Your Room” by Shane McKenzie about what happens to three thugs who try to rob an old man rumored to practice voodoo; “Sisters” by Chris Reed about a very odd sexual experience between a man and a woman with two very strange sisters; and one that really horrified me, “Cena” by Chad McKee about a young man who inadvertently gets caught up in a dog fighting ring.

With most anthologies and collections the stories can run the gamut from great, to good, to not so good.  That’s not the case with D.O.A.  Some stories I liked better than others but I liked every story in the anthology.  I love extreme horror and this collection is definitely extreme.  D.O.A. would make a nice addition to any horror fan’s bookshelf.

-Colleen Wanglund

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DYING DAYS by Armand Rosamilia (2011 Rymfire Books / eBook)

Darlene is trying to survive in a world ravaged by zombies.  She has made her way to northern Florida in the hopes of finding other survivors.  What she finds is an outpost of survivors, a kind of early warning system for the city of St. Augustine, which is alive and well.  

While with this group of survivors, Darlene learns that there are cities all over the country—the world—that have managed to rebuild in the wake of the apocalypse, including her hometown, which she left after losing everything.  Now she is helping to locate a large group of refugees from Orlando, which has not fared so well.  Unfortunately when Darlene and her fellow guides find the refugees, they get a lot more than they bargained for.

With an apocalyptic story that began in HIGHWAY TO HELL and the short story “Rear Guard”, Armand Rosamilia continues the trials of his characters in a world overrun with zombies that are not only hungry, but horny too.  Rosamilia’s take on zombies is definitely unique and that makes his stories stand out from the rest of the pack.  Well-rounded characters and fast-paced action are abundant here.  There is also a bonus short story called “Sons of the New Patriots” which gives a clue to what happened to the refugees making their way from Orlando to St. Augustine.  I love the way Rosamilia’s zombie apocalypse novellas and short stories weave together.  You don’t necessarily have to read HIGHWAY TO HELL before reading DYING DAYS, but I strongly recommend it.  They really are more fun that way.

-Colleen Wanglund

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THE DAILY DEATH: HOW I KILLED MY CO-WORKERS ON 30 DAYS by Thomas Scopel (2012 CreateSpace / 118 pp / tp and eBook)

This is a collection of short stories, but with a bit of a twist - it’s a themed collection.  The author had the audacity to kill his coworkers, using no weapons except his pen.   There are no peaceful deaths here; each person leaves this world in gruesome and strange ways.  The author narrates the beginning of each story, becoming kind of a twisted Rod Serling foreshadowing the events to follow.

This is a “Faces of Death,” literary style instead of on the screen.  Which might be worse, because what we imagine in our minds is usually far worse than what is being portrayed by actors and fake blood.  Most of the stories aren’t supernatural, either - they can accidentally happen.  Some of the deaths are a little exaggerated; similar to the crazy deaths in the “Final Destination” series.  In other words, gross and squishy, but lots of fun.

Since the stories are so short, and each death is very specific, I will just let a few of the ways people are killed off rather than review each story.

You’ve got the badass who refuses to wear a helmet and pays the price.  If you’re afraid of the ocean, your fears will be confirmed in this book.  Nothing is sacred, not even the Great American Pastime.  Stephen King knew that machines could be scary.  And so does Thomas Scopel, who gleefully describes an unfortunate accident.  Carnivals and circuses are a little on the creepy side anyway, made more so throughout the book.  Even reading isn’t safe.

This book isn’t for anybody who takes such stories seriously.  I mean, if the first story offends you, there’s no need to go on.  Death wins every time and in deliciously twisted ways.  But if you have that little something inside you that gleefully reads the “Darwin Awards,” you will absolutely love this collection.

-Sheri White

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FIRST CUT: AN ANTHOLOGY OF FAST-PACED FICTION edited by Heather Wildman (2011 Paper Cut Publishing . 100 pp / tp)

FIRST CUT: AN ANTHOLOGY OF FAST-PACED FICTION is a collection of eight short stories that cover a range of subjects, including aliens, vampires, fate, and insanity.

My favorite story is “Unknown Number” by Mark Allan Gunnells about some weird text messages Ethan receives while waiting to meet his partner Roger.  The sadist sending the texts seems to be watching Ethan and knows that Roger is late…and why.  Ethan disappears and six months later Roger begins getting text messages from a stranger.  This is a very creepy story and a good reason for why you should never answer a call or text from an unknown number.

Other good stories include “Suicide Mission” by David Perlmutter about a very odd seven-year-old terrorist who may have built the perfect bomb; “Throwing Darts” by Gary J. Beharry about how fate intervenes in the life of a man who suddenly finds his life spiraling out of control; and “Station Six” by David Martinez about a man who meets his ideal woman through an internet dating site.

All of the stories were pretty good but I found the book as a whole was average.  However, don’t write it off.  They are all well-written and Ms. Wildman’s editing is top notch.  I personally prefer something a bit more extreme but if that’s not your bag then FIRST CUT is a good book to pick up.

-Colleen Wanglund

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REVIVE by Thomas James Brown (2011 Lulu Publishers / 200 pp / tp)

It is Christmas time and the holiday rush is on.  Phil lost his construction job and is trying to support his wife and kids as a department store Santa.  He is miserable and worried his wife will find out.  Looking for a quiet place to relax and have some coffee, Phil has stumbled upon an out-of-the-way coffee shop called Revive.  Phil has also recently been spooked by some very scary hallucinations while at work—those of an emaciated young girl.

Tammy is hoping to help support her sick mother and two younger brothers as well as try to make a nice Christmas for them.  Getting a job at Revive, she is surprised the place can make any money.  It seems as though the only people ever in the coffee shop are a handful of withered old regulars.  What Tammy doesn’t know is that in an attempt to save the family business, Norman has changed his coffee supplier to someone cheaper.  Rhonda seems to be the only one who can sense that something isn’t quite right, although Tammy has begun to see things that shouldn’t be there.

Christmas Eve and just hours before midnight the regulars have gathered at Revive for their usual coffees and snacks.  Something was not right with the newer coffee beans and tonight Tammy, Phil and the regulars of Revive will find out too late what drinking the coffee has done.

At its core REVIVE is a zombie story with a very unique means of infection.  It is deliberately paced and subtle in its delivery but when the story reaches its climax it hits quick and hard.  Both Tammy and Phil are good people down on their luck and just trying to get through the holiday season.  They each have their issues but in the grand scheme of things, it all really just comes down to survival.  All of the characters are well developed and most are likeable and sympathetic.  I loved how the story kept me reading and wondering what was going to finally happen.  In the end Revive delivers the goods with while not a totally unexpected ending, certainly an interesting one.  Thomas James Brown has added a subtlety to zombies that I really enjoyed.

-Colleen Wanglund

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UNDEAD NOCTURNE: EVEN DEAD MEN DIE by William Todd Rose (2011 Smashwords 2011 / 26 pp / eBook)

Maxwell Lazlow is a private investigator in the corrupt town of Beat City.  He is looking for a missing woman named Ginger, who also happens to be his sister.  He has followed Demetrius Sloan, the man Ginger worked for, to the docks late one night.  Sloan, the biggest crime lord in the city is waiting for a cargo ship from Thailand.

Sloan’s men discover Max and just when it looks like Max’s life is going to end, the cargo ship crashes into the docks and the crew leap overboard, attacking Sloan’s men.  Max gets away and with the help of a good cop finds Sloan’s warehouse.  Max discovers the cargo and is horrified by what he sees. What does Sloan have planned for his unique and deadly cargo?  Will Max survive long enough to find out?

The first in a planned series, UNDEAD NOCTURNE is a well-written novella with engaging characters and a nicely paced story.  Max Lazlow is a likeable character and Sloan is a real bastard who you will love to hate.  Even though UNDEAD NOCTURNE is about the zombie apocalypse, it has a great noir feel to it.  It’s a quick read, mostly because I couldn’t put it down.  I love zombies and William Todd Rose always writes them very well.

-Colleen Wanglund

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EVE HALLOWS AND THE BOOK OF SHRIEKS by Robert Gray (2011 CreateSpace / 252 pp / tp & eBook)

Not only is this one of THE best-looking self-published books I’ve ever had the pleasure of seeing – excellent cover, excellent layout, clean and crisp appearance, professional; I had a hard time believing it WAS a self-pub, had to check and re-check to make sure I wasn’t just missing the company logo somehow – it’s also one of THE most enjoyable reads of what’s been an enjoyable-reads month!

In a very, very different way, of course … in a TBR pile of hardcore horror, gore, and porn, suddenly I’m reading a delightful and quirky YA/kid’s book! One that is as fun, engaging, spooky-charming and all-around awesome as can be. 

Eve Hallows is an ordinary fourteen-year-old girl, or, as ordinary as a fourteen-year-old girl can be when you’re the only human in Gravesville, the dark monster-world where horrible means wonderful, and adorable means awful beyond belief. With a shapeshifter dad, a vampire grandma and werewolf grandpa, a snake-haired Gorgon for a mom and a ghoul for a little brother, and a creepy haunted castle to call home. Sure, Eve often feels disappointed and left out by being so un-monster-y, but she’s happy with her horrible, horrible life. 

Then it all goes wrong. The inhabitants of Gravesville are in danger, threatened by a mysterious organization known as The Source. Someone needs to go undercover and try to find out what’s going on, and Eve’s dad is the monster for the job. 

Any teenager could tell you how much they hate having to move, to leave their friends, and start over at a new school with a bunch of strangers … but Eve and her family are relocating to the human world! It’s a definite fate worse than death, undeath, or anything else. They’ll have a normal human house, interact daily (DAILY, as in, when there’s SUNSHINE) with normal humans, operate a normal human pizza parlor, and Eve will have to go to normal human high school! 

Of course, that’s just the beginning of Eve’s troubles. Not only does she have mocking mean girls and a cute boy crush to deal with, not only is the principal a Halloween-hating grump, she soon finds herself caught in the middle of The Source’s plot. It could be up to Eve and her handful of misfit friends to save the day for humans and monsters alike!

So, move over, Neil Gaiman’sCORALINE and THE GRAVEYARD BOOK … make room, Lemony Snicket’s A SERIES OF UNFORTUNATE EVENTS … you’ve got company and competition for shelf space!

-Christine Morgan

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THE MILL by Mark West (2011 Greyhart Press / 39 pp / eBook chapbook)

West's chapbook deals with a group of people who meet to counsel each other over the recent loss of a loved ones.  When Michael's wife Nicola succumbs to breast cancer, he begins having strange dreams that a counselor had warned him about.  He soon discovers that Saskia (another recent widow) has been having similar dreams about a local place where an old mill once stood.

THE MILL is a depressing yet eerie ghost story featuring some sharp writing and a dark yet comforting ending.  Fans of Gary A. Braunbeck will eat this up.

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NEXT MONTH:

Jessie Shimmer returns in Lucy A. Snyder's SWITCHBLADE GODDESS, Linda Addison's HOW TO RECOGNIZE A DEMON HAS BECOME YOUR FRIEND, William Ollie's PITCH, and many more...

JANUARY, 2012 REVIEWS

JANUARY, 2012 REVIEWS

(NOTE: The "smell ratings" at the end of some reviews rate the actual SMELL of the book and have nothing to do with the story.  Smell Ratings: 5 = excellent, 1 = odorless, 2-4 = you figure it out.  Book Key: hc = hardcover / tp = trade paperback / mmp - mass market paperback / rarer forms described.  Unless otherwise noted, all reviews are by Nick Cato)

MAL CONTENTS (v/a) (2011 Grand Mal Press / 189 pp / tp)

This collection of four novellas begins with Randy Chandler's HOWLER, about a hairy girl (nick-named Wolf Girl) who leaves a brothel to work as a circus side-show freak.  She becomes close with a pair of Jewish performers until a gang of redneck Nazis attack, all the while being mentally tormented by a strange, squid-like creature.  It's a violent, heart-breaking tale that gets things off to a great start.

Next up is THE MUSHROOMS by Gregory L. Norris, where TV cooking show host Sunny Weir is assaulted by a would-be chef who failed to make it onto a competition program.  When Sunny goes to an isolated house to relax and heal from her injuries, her assailant takes revenge in a supernatural way.  Norris gets the chills going and (amazingly) manages to make a mushroom-creature anything but campy.

My favorite of the bunch is Ryan C. Thomas' CHOOSE, about a computer store owner who is almost killed when someone enters his store and puts a gun to his temple, claiming he has made his life a living hell.  But instead of shooting, the mysterious gunmen gives him a choice: by midnight this night, he must shoot and kill either his wife or teenage daughter, or he'll kill all three of them.  A cop sent to protect the family is quickly dispatched, and despite hiding in another town there seems to be no escape from this otherwordly psycho.  Thomas' tale is tight, full of nail-biting suspense and is one of the darker short stories I've read this year.

Ending things is David T. Wilbanks' THE OUTSIDER TRIO.  After two years, a man returns to proclaim his love for his girlfriend only to find she has been missing for six months.  Malcom learns Violet (a professional violinist) has been kidnapped by some kind of cult-like musician, and with the help of an occult practicioner, manages to track her down, being held prisoner in another dimension.  TRIO features some dark humor and all kinds of weird monsters, making for a fun way to wrap up a satisfying collection.

Smell Rating: 2

A PACK OF WOLVES by Eric S. Brown (2011 Grand Mal Press / Kindle Edition 176 KB)

A family is reunited and on a mission.  Graham, Zed, Yule, Sarah and Shannon are looking for their brother Samuel who is trying to raise an army.  This is no ordinary family.  They are a pack of werewolves—pure blooded.  Samuel has a very deep hatred of humans since witnessing his parents’ murder when just a boy.  That hatred has led him to seek out dark magic and a very powerful spirit that will allow Samuel to enact his revenge. 

Samuel is making his way across America’s Western frontier, slaughtering most and creating his army out of the strongest humans he comes across.  They are called the Created and they are inferior to the pure werewolves.  Samuel also has the help of a mysterious man dressed in white with the voice of an angel.  The family is on his trail…but can they stop Samuel before his plans reach fruition?

Set in the American Old West, A PACK OF WOLVES is a fast-paced, action-packed novella full of memorable characters.  Eric S. Brown has differentiated between pure werewolves and those created by accident or happenstance, endowing each family/pack member with a different strength, besides the obvious.  Character development is excellent and the story contains a few surprises, some that will be recognizable to regular readers of Brown’s work.  The prose is tight and flows easily and Brown keeps things unpredictable, which is a huge plus in my book.

Having already helped redefine the zombie sub-genre, Eric S. Brown continues to push the boundaries of the horror genre.  Brown has revitalized zombies, Bigfoot and aliens, and now seems to be expanding on the phenomenon of Western horror.  A PACK OF WOLVES is a must-get for any horror fan’s collection.

-Colleen Wanglund

NORTHWOODS DEEP by Joel Arnold (2011 Studio City Media Endeavors / 374 pp / tp)

Books like this are a big part of why I’ll never be the outdoorsy type. 

Isn’t that enough, without also having to hike, camp, canoe, or otherwise endure the miseries of blisters, mosquitos and lack of indoor potties before you even GET to the REALLY bad parts? Like, hey, having a miserable time yet? Let’s make it WORSE!!!

Let’s bring on a spooky little cabin in the middle of nowhere, some creepy psychos, demonic dogs, mutilations, murders, unspeakable violations … 

Yep, NORTHWOODS DEEP is one of those books. This is the stuff a low-budget indie summer horror movie could be made of.

It even goes a step further, because one of the characters – Carol – is looking to escape an already miserable situation. She’s being stalked by her abusive jerk of an ex-husband, who’s got his buddies and even his mother helping in the harrassment. To Carol, a back-to-nature getaway with her sister seems like a reprieve, a real improvement. 

Except, of course, her ex finds out about her travel plans and decides to surprise her along the way … only, he’s in for a surprise himself … as are the sisters’ brother and dad, who go looking for them … and a friend they meet along the way … there’s surprises in store for everybody, and none of those surprises are very nice. 

The cover’s eye-catching, it’s a solid 360-ish pages of good-looking book with minor editorial/proofreading problems here and there. Some of its story threads seem to trail off at loose ends – there’s a moment where one of the characters thinks “It all makes sense now, it all makes sense” and as I read it I remember wishing it made sense to me. 

So, overall, I found NORTHWOODS DEEP to be an okay read, entertaining, with several flinch-inducing scenes and a general aftertaste of eew. No Richard Laymon, of course, but then what else is? 

-Christine Morgan

THE NOCTUARY by Greg Chapman (2011 Damnation Books / 56 pp / tp)

Chapman's latest novella is a sort-of homage to Clive Barker, but unlike other "homages" this one has its own voice and style.

Struggling writer Simon Ryan falls into the hands of creatures who are the incarnations of dark muse: they offer him a chance to re-write his abusive life story, but things don't turn out the way Simon had intended.

And just when Simon thinks he'll forever be a scribe for the underworld, a former captive of these creatures helps him escape...although his new-found reality could be darker than ever before.

THE NOCTUARY blends supernatural and real-life horrors quite well.  Kudos to Chapman for dealing with a side-plot of child abuse in a non-exploitative (but still chilling) manner.

SANTA STEPS OUT by Robert Devereaux (2011 Deadite Press / 294 pp / tp)

You know how people sometimes bemoan that this or that is “ruining” their childhoood? 

Maybe it’s some remake or sequel to something they cherished as a kid … the 2010 Clash of the Titans, for instance … or 2008’s A Miser Brothers Christmas. Maybe it’s any of the countless Rule 34 violations (for which there are no exceptions), presenting beloved iconic characters in a whole new light. Maybe it’s a Weird Al parody or an episode of South Park. 

Whatever it is, you know how when it tarnishes, despoils, drags down and utterly debases in unspeakable ways something held near and dear to the heart, people say that thing about it ruining their childhood?

From now on, whenever I hear that complaint, I will think of this book and I will just LAUGH. Because, honey, you think your childhood’s been ruined already? Oh, dear me, you haven’t seen anything yet. 

Robert Devereaux’s SANTA STEPS OUT Steps Out is a nonstop sex-romp slathered in gore. It takes the cherished, benign, commercially-sanitized, popular images of Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy and the Easter Bunny, and corrupts them in ways that have to be read to be believed. 

Check those fond memories at the door and get ready to be startled … shocked … horrified … maybe even offended and outraged … though really, if you think those latter two might apply, you may want to consider saving your sanity. 

At this most wonderful time of the year, when the news is full of histrionic war-on-holidays hoopla, there’s always eventually the mention of how much of current religion and tradition is taken from pagan roots anyway. That’s the underlying element in this book as well: the gods, myths, and mythic figures of old have been transformed. 

Santa Claus and his cheery band of elves used to be older, wilder powers, forces of nature … the lusty Pan and his faun-followers. The side of Santa that has been subsumed, buried, and blocked off is reawakened when he crosses paths with the Tooth Fairy, once a nymph, one Christmas Eve. 

To call it an affair is putting it mildly. The resulting relationship spans decades and leads to all kinds of troubles, not the least of which occurs when sweet Mrs. Claus finds out and demands he gives up his mistress. That thing about how hell hath no fury like a woman scorned gets kicked up a few notches when immortals are involved. The jilted Tooth Fairy recruits the already-teetering-towards-depravity Easter Bunny as an accomplice in her revenge plot, the hapless elves find themselves put to work in a far different capacity than toymaking, and to top it off, Santa falls in love with a mortal woman, a nice single mom. That’s when it really hits the fan. 

So, yeah. Nonstop sex-romp slathered in gore. It’s sickeningly fun, squickeningly hot, hilariously disturbing, childhood-ruining holiday porn. 

Worst of all, not only did I greatly enjoy this book, I have several friends for whom it’d make the ideal present! 

-Christine Morgan

(EDITOR'S NOTE: SANTA STEPS OUT was originally published in hardcover in 1998 and mass market paperback in 2000.  Next month, Christine takes a look at the long-awaited sequel, SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE HOMOPHOBES.  We kid you not.  -Nick)

BEYOND THE BARRIERS by Timothy W. Long (2011 Permuted Press / 221 pp / eBook)

Erik Tragger is ex-military, divorced and living in a small Oregon town when the dead start to rise.  Erik gathers up some supplies from his home and decides to ride out the end of the world in a secluded cabin in the mountains.  After months of isolation and hearing no news from the world Erik decides to try to make it back to his town and see about getting more supplies, which are beginning to run dangerously low.

What he finds upon his return is not what Erik expected.  It seems there are more than just your run of the mill zombies to contend with.  Saved from certain death by a group of survivors in an abandoned Walmart, Erik discovers that the ghouls he encountered were humans who fed on the flesh of zombies.  At first it was out of desperation but it has quickly become apparent that these ghouls want to make more of their kind—a freakish zombie/human hybrid.

After helping the group from the super store get away so they can head to Portland, Erik ends up back at the cabin with Katherine, another survivor.  After some months they are attacked and forced back to the town they originally fled from.  What ultimately awaits Erik in this new and dangerous world is beyond anything he could have imagined.

  

BEYOND THE BARRIERS is another book that attempts to take the zombie sub-genre in a new direction and Long succeeds in that effort.  BARRIERS sets up a very frightening scenario for the end of the world and it is a book that I could not put down.  Characters are well-developed and have a depth that enables the reader to connect to them.  The ending is rather unexpected and left intentionally vague….I’m hoping that means a sequel?  Anyway, having seen a glut of zombies in the horror genre, I am pleased to see writers like Timothy Long taking risks and their zombies into new directions.  Get this book.

-Colleen Wanglund

THE RED EMPIRE AND OTHER STORIES by Joe McKinney (2012 Redrum Horror / 356 pp / tp)

McKinney, best known for his Dead World zombie novels, here delivers a collection featuring a novella and seven shorts, most with a police-theme.

In the novella THE RED EMPIRE, a secret military bio-weapon is accidentally unleashed on a small town where a woman and her young daughter (who is recovering from having cornea implants) are trying to get home during a heavy rain storm.  Adding to the problem is an escaped cop killer, who seeks refuge in the woman's isolated home.  While the story is action-packed and will give you the willies, it's almost as if the killer-ant thing takes a back seat to the psycho/hostage drama.  Good, if a bit uneven.

'Blemish' is a love/ghost story dealing with a cop who ends up leaving the force, and while I didn't find it spooky, McKinney's take on ghosts and lost love is well done.  'Cold Case' deals with a rookie cop who becomes fascinated with the story of a cop who was slain during his second day on the force...back in 1900.  Why this short tale (which originally appeared on a true crime blog) was included in a horror fiction collection is anyone's guess.

My favorite piece here is titled 'The Old Man Under the Sea,' an addictive tale featuring Ernest Hemmingway in Cuba--fresh off a boxing match with Louis Lamour--who becomes enticed by a young girl, only to have her father threaten his life if he doesn't help him with a dangerous diving expedition.  The suspense and mystery here never lets up, and McKinney handles this classic literary figure in a slick way.

'The Millstone' is a pointless trailer-trash outing about two sisters, their wacky neighbor, a cheating boyfriend, and an axe.  Likewise, 'Empty Room' is a sort-of ghost tale about a suicidal would-be father.  And a pistol.  Both tales are forgettable.

The very-well done 'Burning Finger Man' pits a cop assigned to a housing project against an impossible-to-grab freak who molests women in the hallways then seemingly vanishes. Its cast of crackheads and hood rats gives it a genuine hood-film feel. The collection concludes with 'Eyes Open,' an apocalyptic/Lovecraftian yarn about a cop who becomes "enlightened" by a schziophrenic homeless man about a coming calamity.  I'm a sucker for cult-themed stories and this one's quite satisfying.

THE RED EMPIRE AND OTHER STORIES is all over the place, which is fine; but coming from a new small press dedicated to horror fiction, I was surprised to see so many non-genre stories in the mix.  The good tales heavily outweight the bad (and thankfully, the longer stories are the more memorable), so it's still worth your time.  This is the first I've read from McKinney and it's easy to see why he has so much material out there.

INHERENT DARK by Thomas James Brown (2011 Thomas Jane Brown / 94 pp / tp)

INHERENT DARK is a sort of fairy-tale retelling, with the Deadly Sins personified as entities not demon and not fae but reminiscent of both. The book contains one story for each of the seven, with the stories more or less interlinked. 

There’s nice use of description, and the language strives to be stylistic of the classic fairy tales. Some are more strongly written than others, with some clever twists. Overall, though, the writing is passive, a little stuffy, not as vibrant as the underlying idea seems to call for. 

The book opens with a series of authorial notes on the origins of each story, which probably should have been presented at the end rather that the beginning … partly for spoiler reasons, mainly because they’re on the pompous, self-congratulatory side. 

For a self-published book, it’s not bad. I’ve certainly seen worse. But I’ve also seen better. 

-Christine Morgan

RETURN TO DARKNESS by Michael Laimo (2011 Bad Moon Books / 337 pp / tp)

This sequel to the author's 2004 DEEP IN THE DARKNESS picks up right where things left off seven years ago.  The backstory: Dr. Michael Cayle--who has moved his family from Manhattan to a small town in New Hampshire--becomes a slave to a race of small creatures known as Isolates.  They hold his wife and daughter prisoner as they force Michael to heal their sick and mend their wounded in their underground lair.  The creatures have control of everyone in town, and five surrounding towns are also under their spell, making escape impossible.

RETURN TO DARKNESS finds Dr. Michael about to committ suicide, when the thought of his wife and daughter out there in the woods convinces him to go on with the hellish ordeal.  His wife--having been raped by an Isolate and given birth to a demon baby in the first novel--now has Isolate DNA running through her veins.  She appears to Michael as a half human/half monster...but his young daughter Jessica still seems to be all human.  The only way for Michael to get his family back is to have a different person sacrifice an animal to the creatures...a feat that was put on him by an alleged friend, a ritual that has been the town's dark tradition for centuries.

A family of four move in to the neighborhood, and before long Michael plans ways to get one of them to take his place.  But the father is a drunk lunatic, his wife and teenage son no better.  The eighteen-year-old daughter Shea, however, takes a liking to Michael, and before long helps him find his daughter while he helps her to get revenge on her father who has raped and abused her since she was a child.

What follows is a bloody horrific time as Michael--with increasingly poor health due to struggles with the Isolates--plots a way to escape the cursed town with his daughter, all the while wondering what to do about his possessed wife and his feelings for the young girl who risks life and limb to help him.

Like DEEP IN THE DARKNESS, RETURN is chock-full of suspense, plenty of scares and creepy atmosphere, and an impending sense of doom that'll leave readers breathless.  Laimo gives the "ancient evil in a small town" thing a fresh kick in the pants here, delivering a sequel that's every bit as frightening as its predecessor.  This is MUST reading for fans of DEEP, and while newbies will get a better effect if they read DEEP first, there's still enough background given to make it work as a stand alone novel.

The seven year wait for RETURN was well worth it, from its fast paced opening right up to the darker than dark finale.

Smell Rating: 2

DEAD HUNGER by Eric A. Shelman (2011 Dolphin Moon Publishing / 268 pp / tp)

When the zombie apocalypse happened Flex Sheridan was on the phone with his sister Jamie.  Flex knows something is very wrong so he makes his way to Jamie’s house only to find she is a zombie and her husband and daughter Jesse are dead.  Flex does find his niece Trina as well as his lost love Gem.

A virus has attacked the living and turned them into zombies by destroying the brain.  The main symptom is a migraine-like headache.  Flex and Gem decide to make their way to the CDC in Atlanta to look for other survivors and hopefully find a cure so they can save Jamie.  Along the way they pick up Hemp, a scientist who is determined to find the cause of the apocalypse.  What they ultimately discover about the zombies is truly frightening.

The first in a planned series of zombie apocalypse novels, DEAD HUNGER reminds me of a pulp novel.  Some of the scenarios were a little too-good-to-be-true as were the main characters, but it is very entertaining.  The novel is well-written and a fast-paced read.  Character development is very good as is Eric Shelman’s curve ball where the zombies are concerned.

DEAD HUNGER has some interesting twists and an unpredictable nail-biter of an ending, which is a great thing in my opinion.  Overall I enjoyed DEAD HUNGER and believe Shelman has penned a cool addition to zombie apocalypse lit.

-Colleen Wanglund

PREVIEW:

PURE by Julianna Baggott (to be released February 8, 2012 by Grand Central Publishing / 448 pp / hc & eBook)

Since this one came to me as a proof copy, I don’t know if the cover it had will be the final cover it ends up with on the shelves … if so, it’ll be a risky choice in terms of marketing. Because it’s a matte-white, with the title on the front and the author on the spine in lettering of shiny white, no images, no text at all. It does make a statement, I’ll give it that, but both of my test subjects (the husband and the teen) said they’d be disinclined to pick it up based on such a cover.   (EDITORS NOTE: We've FOUND the cover art!  -Nick)

That said, the story inside is fantastic! It lands somewhere in the territory between McCammon’s Swan Song and Collins’ The Hunger Games, a near-future post-holocaust setting meant for the YA set but entirely accessible and engrossing to the older reader. 

In Pure, society is divided into the haves and the have-nots, several years after a devastating event called the Detonations. 

The haves were those who reached the Dome in time, sheltered from the blasts and radiation inside its controlled environment. They live regimented, orderly lives where their resource-consumption / usefulness ratio is considered, where their fates are decided for them, where likely boys are “coded” for enhancements in intellect and athleticism, where girls are designated worthy of reproducing or not, all depending on aptitude and genetics. To them, the people outside are “wretches,” the savage and insane who refused sanctuary. 

Outside of the Dome, it’s all very different. They view the people of the Dome as “Pures,” the lucky untouched, because their world is a blasted hellscape where survivors exist as best they can, each sporting a different disfigurement or mutation as a result of the Detonations. That bit, I found, was the best, most haunting, most creatively imagined aspect of the whole book. The oh-wow-too-cool factor, which hearkens to the Wild Card novels and the entire spectrum of ace and joker abilities. 

Some wretches are “fused” with whatever they happened to be in contact with at the time, resulting in strange living amalgams of human and inanimate object, or animal, or other human. These range from mild (a speckling of glass fused with a person’s skin) to bizarre (one character has living birds embedded in his back, another’s lower leg is fused with the spine of a dog so he has a dog-foot) to severe (“Groupies” are masses of conjoined people stuck forever together, “Dusts” are scraps of sentience merged mostly with the ground, “Beasts” are so animalistic they’ve lost any semblance of humanity). 

Our main characters are Pressia and Partridge. Pressia, whose fist is fused with a doll’s head (the eyes still blink when she tips her hand back and forth, one of the creepiest touches ever!), lives in the wreckage with her grandfather and ekes out a living trading little sculptures she makes from debris. Partridge is a Pure, the son of a Dome leader who should be destined for a productive place but finds himself unfit for coding, and unsettled when he begins to realize that the histories he’s been told are far from the truth. 

So, Partridge finds a way to escape the Dome … he runs into Pressia … with her help as well as that of rebellious conspiracy freedom-fighter Bradwell, they seek to uncover the truth, expose the conspiracy, and find the facts. Which, as they soon discover, are a lot farther-reaching than they had ever imagined. 

Their adventures and a cast of engaging sub-plots with secondary characters (the Dome’s treatment of Partridge’s accidental accomplice, Lyda … the dysfunctional relationship of soldier el Capitan and his fused younger brother) make for a rich and engaging read. I will definitely be on the lookout for the sequel, and told the teen enough about it to win her over despite her initial reaction to the cover. 

I stand envious of Ms. Baggott’s vision as well as her ability to carry it off with such deft skill. Heck, I was 350 pages into it before it dawned on me that the whole thing was in present-tense, too, and that is a hard trick to pull off smoothly! 

Awesome stuff. Very recommended.

-Christine Morgan

BEYOND THE VALLEY OF THE APOCALYPSE DONKEYS (2011 Copeland Valley Press / 174 pp / tp and limited edition hardcover)

While there's no squids, living sex dolls, or obscure foot fetishists in Krall's latest novella, it turned out to be one of the author's strangest (and best) offerings to date...so if you're a bizarro lover pay attention:

Gary Lancaster reviews obscure films exclusively for print publications.  He's on a mission to find a rare film---one he had seen bits and pieces of at a young age.  He manages to track down a crude VHS copy of THE APOCALYPSE DONKEY, his journey taking him to a modern day nudist colony where he meets a sexy older woman in a donkey mask, who he hooks up with.  Trouble starts when her jealous husband (a professional daredevil) finds out and tries to kill him.  Things take a wicked turn when daredevil "Big" Bill Stapleton tries to run Gary over in a diner before he teams up with a flamboyant Mexican chef.

The rest is classic Krall, combining cult film camp with surreal situations and plenty of off key humor.  If you're a fan you'll want this...if you're new to bizarro you just might lose your mind.

There's also plenty of nifty extras here, especially in the limited hardcover edition (a preface, introduction, and foreword from three different authors, as well as a hysterical afterword by Matthew Revert and Krall's interesting notes on the text of each chapter PLUS another Krall short story).  BEYOND THE VALLEY OF THE APOCALYPSE DONKEYS gives the feel of a 60s/70s H.G. Lewis/Russ Meyer nudie movie meshed with a classic underground midnight cult film.

You gotta love it...

Smell Rating: 4

HEART OF GLASS by David Winnick (2011 Bad Moon Books / tp)

This slim little volume contains a single story that, while well-written, only served to whet the appetite. The characters – Adam and his disaffected wife, Sonia – are vivid and sympathetic enough that you really want to get to know them better, you want to find out more about what brought their marriage to its empty, going-through-the-motions state. 

And, of course, you want to know lots more about the peculiar glass jigsaw puzzle Adam brings home one day from an antiquing outing (presumably the Heart of Glass of the title). 

But, just when all this is warming up in your mind, just when things are nicely spooky in a psychological and emotional sense, the story takes a sudden Twilight Zone turn and then it’s over. 

Kind of disappointing, really. A sample, a taste, and that’s it. Maybe if there’d been more stories to make a collection, I might’ve felt more satisfied. A forty page book of which the story takes up twenty-six pages … I read it in a matter of minutes and was left with a sense of “well, NOW what?”

-Christine Morgan

THE BRAINPAN CONCERTO by Kurt Newton (2011 Sideshow Press /  123 pp / tp)

A musical maniac is kidnapping those with extrodinary musical talent, removing their skull caps and tapping into their brains to record some of the most original music ever heard by human ears.  With the help of a computer hacker, a young music fan manages to track  the lunatic down, only to become another hostage.

On the case are detectives Saul and Gwen, both with their own jaded pasts, an annoying, sexist boss, and they currently happen to be falling for each other.  Along with the young boy, Saul eventually becomes hostage to the maniac's musical scalpel, leaving no other choice but for Gwen to come to the rescue.

THE BRAINPAN CONCERTO features a nifty idea for the killings and has some truly gruesome moments, and despite the standard police fare, I found Newton's quick novella a fine way to spend an hour or so.

Smell Rating: 1

PREVIEW:

ENORMITY by W.G. Marshall (to be released February, 2012 by Night Shade Books / 280 pp / tp)

Manny Lopes is an American working in Korea, is sort-of married and is sort-of having an affair with a co-worker.  One day an accidental (or is it?) quantum explosion occurs, turning Manny into the size of a mountain...one of the BIGGEST characters ever to appear in a novel.

While Korea is dealing with him (every step he takes causes tsunamis and destroys entire towns), a second giant is spotted near Japan.  It turns out she's a North Korean assassin named Yoon-sook, who worships The Wizard of Oz, and as Manny goes to meet up with her, her government makes her change course for the United States.  Manny's allies manage to hook up to his ear drum and speak with him, guiding him on his cross-planet trek.

Manny and Yoon-sook met up in an odd confrontation at the Grand Canyon; Manny tries to convice her that since they're the only two giants on the planet, they should unite.  His sweet talking leads to one of the more bizarre sex scenes in recent memory, although Yoon-sook uses it to her advantage.

With another strange creature emerging from this unusual meeting, some great side characters, dark humor and plenty of social commentary, ENORMITY is a fun homage to the sci-fi creature features of the 50s.  The detail that Marshall gives in explaining what such a large person might be like (from the aforementioned walking effects down to the germs on his skin) makes this quite an imaginative read, and one you'll whiz through in no time.  KUDOS for a politically incorrect Muslim named Salim Ali, who rides inside Yook-sook's ear and does something that might have Islamic groups up in arms...yet I laughed my ass off.

Don't miss this.

SUBJECT SEVEN by James A. Moore (2011 Razorbill {an imprint of Penguin Group} / 328 pp / tp)

Some years ago a private company established a secret facility in order to create the perfect weapon for the military.  Initially the experiments proved a failure but one of the test subjects escaped.  Over the years Subject Seven has used his unique abilities to survive and track down the people responsible for his existence.  He has also discovered that there are others like him living in total ignorance of what they really are.  Subject Seven has sent out a command and awoken the other teens from their long slumber.  As Joe Bronx, Subject Seven has gathered the other teens in Boston and told them what they really are.  However, he has decided to keep his true motives a secret for the time being.  Now Evelyn Hope, one of the few survivors from the night of Seven’s escape, is determined to stop them and bring them back alive.

SUBJECT SEVEN is Moore’s first Young Adult novel but it is just as appealing for adults.  The story is compelling, and more violent than I would have expected from a YA title.  Character development is excellent and the teens’ personalities are diverse and relatable.  They are average kids from different backgrounds but once transformed become dangerous and almost indestructible monsters….for that is what they were created to be.  They are also sympathetic characters—they had no control or say in what was done to them by adults that were supposed to protect them.

SUBJECT SEVEN is a frightening page-turner that ends with quite the cliffhanger, as it is the first in a series…and I am greatly anticipating the next novel.  It is a fantastic read for older teens and adults alike.

-Colleen Wanglund

DAWN OF WAR (BLOOD WAR TRILOGY) by Tim Marquitz (2011 CreateSpace / 218 pp / tp)

On the planet Ahreele a devastating war has begun.  The savage and animalistic Grol have recently acquired powerful magic weapons from the land of the Sha’ree, a mystical people long thought to be dead.  Arrin, a man living in exile for the last fifteen years has seen the devastation first hand and has gone back to his home of Lathah to warn them of the approaching doom.  

Cael is a young boy whose home of Nurin has been overrun and destroyed by the Korme, who are loosely allied with the Grol using the same magic weapons.  While making a desperate run into the Dead Lands he meets two Sha’ree who are on a mission to warn civilization as well as gather together the bearers of far older magic to defeat the enemies of peace.  Cael carries one of these ancient devices.

Domor of the Vel attempts to make his way through the Dead Lands as well to find his family in Nurin.  He, along with his blood companion run into other enemies with magic weapons but are saved by the two Sha’ree and the Pathra, cat people who are allies of the human Lathans.

Can a small band of people from different lands join with their allies and defeat their enemies?  And who is Sultae of the Sha’ree and what of the plague that supposedly killed them all?  The band of hopeful heroes must also contend with the Tumult, a time when the two moons cross paths and wreak havoc on the planet.

DAWN OF WAR, book one of the trilogy is Tim Marquitz’s first foray into fantasy fiction and he has done an exceptional job.  There is a lot going on and there are many points of view to follow but Marquitz keeps it all tight and easy to follow.  Character development is very good, keeping each race of people easily identifiable.  This first book introduces the various points of view and ends on just the proper note, leaving the reader wanting to read more.  I’m not generally big on fantasy, but I enjoyed DAWN OF WAR immensely.  I think you will, too.

-Colleen Wanglund 

DEAD TIDE RISING by Stephen A. North (2010 CreateSpace / 270 pp / tp)

In DEAD TIDE, Stephen A. North introduced us to various people attempting to survive and escape the newly begun zombie apocalypse in Pinellas Park, Florida.  DEAD TIDE RISING continues with those chaotic first few hours and days of the collapse of civilization.  The president’s wife and children were in St. Petersburg when it all went to Hell.  A cruise ship was attacked by the military for violating the quarantine imposed on the city and surrounding suburbs.  Two groups of people, including public servants, attempt to make it out of the station and get to one of the supposed safe evacuation zones.  Another group who escaped the carnage at the harbor is assessing their situation in a boat on the bay.  And one soldier has gone completely off the deep end.  

Not everyone will survive.  The military initially issued a shoot to kill order for both infected and uninfected alike.  The government is in shambles and dealing with mutiny in the ranks.  Not even the president is safe in his hidden bunker.  People are dying at the hands of the zombies and each other.  Will anyone make it out alive?

I really liked North’s first book DEAD TIDE and now love its sequel DEAD TIDE RISING.  The book seamlessly continues the initial chaos from the first book and in the same tone.  There are no scenarios that would or could be considered too ridiculous even for apocalyptic fiction.  Character development is just right for the run and gun style of North’s writing.  The story’s pacing is quick and even and keeps the attention to the unpredictable events throughout the story.  No character is sacred.  Stephen A. North once again does a great job with the zombie sub-genre.

-Colleen Wanglund

NEXT MONTH:

Jeff Strand returns with the long awaited 4th novel in his ANDREW MAYHEM series...